💭 Week #25: Why Notifications Rarely Deliver What They Promise
Not every ping deserves your nervous system.
It was estimated that the average person received more than 40 notifications per day on their phone. How many do you usually get?
We even know when our phone will notify us.
A buzz.
A sound.
The screen lights up.
The red badges.
What I’ve noticed is that notifications have a significant effect on our daily lives.
When we hear or see that our phone has notified us, a subtle feeling arises that asks, “What did I think was waiting for me?” A notification is likely a message, a meme that your friend sent, a routine update, an ad, or a memory from a long time ago. Nothing profound. Just… normal.
The difference is the anticipation and the content.
We anticipate new information that will be useful or meaningful, yet the content is typically ordinary.
Here are some of the thoughts I’ve noticed about how notifications negatively affect our daily lives.
Fragmented Focus. When your phone buzzes, it prompts you to check what's going on. Suppose you are studying or engaged in deep work when you receive a notification. The notification interrupted your flow, and you might not appreciate it! Even if it is just a single notification, your thoughts are shifting, and your focus has become fragmented.
Constant Future Orientation. This is especially noticeable when you are waiting for a message. Instead of doing your present tasks, you are currently living in anticipation. You are constantly thinking about what the phone might give to you. Life is now shifting toward what might arrive next.
Inflated Expectations. Each buzz carries the suggestion that something important has occurred. It feels as though it could matter. Yet in most cases, it does not. The emotional anticipation outweighs the informational value.
It is worth noting that there are beneficial instances when notifications help us, especially when they are rare, relevant, time-sensitive, and aligned with our priorities. However, when notifications are frequent, non-urgent, algorithm-driven, and designed to manipulate emotions, they become problematic.
So, what should we do about the notifications? 🔔
The goal is not elimination but calibration. How? Consider the tips below:
Restore Intentional Focus. Turn off non-essential notifications. Check apps on your schedule rather than letting them interrupt you.
Reclaim Present Awareness. Designate “notification-free” hours during deep work or meaningful activities. When waiting for something important, set a specific check-in time rather than living in constant anticipation.
Align Notifications with Value. Audit your current notifications. Ask: “Does this genuinely serve my priorities, or is it designed to capture my attention?” Keep only what passes that test.
Prioritize Signal Over Noise. Prioritize the apps and people you don't want to miss when they nudge you, especially when they are worth disrupting your deep work.
Create Friction for Yourself. Remove visual badges, disable sounds, keep your phone in the box, or keep it in another room during focused time. Small barriers help you regain agency. But do it intentionally.
Having more than 40 notifications per day may be average, but it doesn’t have to be inevitable. We must calibrate rather than eliminate. Then we shift from being reactive to being intentional users for our well-being.
If this felt meaningful to you, you can quietly tap this text. 🐈⬛
💭 Set Do Not Disturb on Your Phone
Most modern phones have a “Do Not Disturb” feature. As we’ve mentioned above, notifications are good when they are time-sensitive, and this feature is useful when you are in deep work. Simply turn it on and then engage in deep work.
You might be worried when something important comes up that's worth disrupting your deep work. Depending on the phone model, you can specify which individuals are allowed to call or message you when this feature is activated. Take a moment to research how this feature works on your specific phone model. Turn it on when you are ready. On most phones, you can go to Settings > Notifications > Do not disturb.
Here are a few how-to articles that might be helpful for each operating system:
✧ Android—Limit interruptions with Modes & Do Not Disturb on Android - Android Help
✧ iOS—How to turn Do Not Disturb off or on for iPhone or iPad
When you're ready to be bombarded with notifications, turn it off and see if any of the notifications you received are worth your attention. At this point, you may notice that receiving notifications has become rare, and that is beneficial. 🟢
💭 Digital Minimalism
Cal Newport’s Digital Minimalism is helpful if you are curating your relationship with your phone. This book examines methods to reduce digital clutter and use technology deliberately. Newport is also proposing a thirty-day declutter and practices to prioritize meaningful activities, solitude, and sustained focus amid pervasive digital distraction.
💭 Badges? We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Red Badges (On Our iPhone Apps)
See those red badges? Do you find it helpful or annoying? 🔴
Austin MacWorks explains why those badges are helpful and not so helpful and what to do with them. Even though the article is meant for those people using iOS, the advice is platform-agnostic because badges are seen everywhere.
💭 Our Manifesto: One Per Week Only
We share. You receive. A gentle moment. A wonderous sight. A random nice stuff. For inspiration. Once a week. That’s it! Why just once a week? Bombarding your inbox is invasive, so we thoughtfully send just one gentle letter each week. A softly bundled mix of nice stuff—for you and your curious mind. We don’t like too much noise. We secretly hate it! That's it? Yes, that's so simple.
💭 Reminder
My phone is blasting this music as I write this essay.
💭 Chocolate Planets
A scrumptious box of chocolate planets from Martin’s Chocolatier is aesthetically pleasing. Each of the planets has its own distinct flavor—cream, blueberry, cherry ganache, and more. Warning: this box of chocolates contains Mercury! 😅
💭 Teal
What was your favorite color? I love teal. 🦚
I remember that single-page spread in the book with a puzzle set against a deep teal background, and I feel a sense of comfort just gazing at it. Teal is the color of tranquility, calmness, and deepness.
Personally, I’m drawn to calmness, depth, and mystery. Teal is often found in rainforest areas where I lived, especially at dawn and dusk, and it feels soothing yet carries a hint of unease.
💭 Hugo
Thinking about teal reminds me of this film, which showcases stunning teal and orange tones in its cinematic scenes. It’s one of my favorites for its visuals, and it’s no surprise it was nominated for Best Picture.
This film is set in 1930 and follows the story of a young orphan named Hugo who lives in the walls of a train station. His late father left him a mysterious mechanical man, which Hugo believes holds a secret message. While trying to fix the automaton, Hugo encountered Georges Méliès, a pioneering filmmaker now forgotten by the world, working as a toy shop owner. As the film unfolds, Hugo and his new friend, Isabelle, uncover the mystery surrounding Méliès and the automaton, bringing the forgotten filmmaker’s work and legacy back to life.
💭 Kindness is good
You know what’s underrated? Letting people be. Letting them mispronounce a word, talk too much about a show they love, or get excited about something you don’t understand. You don’t have to get it, just be kind. Everyone’s got something that lights them up. Let them shine, even if it’s not your thing.
This piece has been featured across all kinds of media, making it tough to figure out who originally said it. 😶🌫️
💭 Confused fledgling
Fledglings often become confused about why a worm won't go into their mouths, as they were previously fed by their mother when they were just nestlings. They assume that food such as seeds and worms will be dropped to their mouths. The behavior is natural because it is part of their development. Soon enough, they’ll realize they can seek food without a parent’s assistance.
⚘ But how do birds catch a worm? Find out in this video.
💭 Boredom is fine
💭 Author’s Message
I have been sick for these few days, and the publishing of this new entry is delayed. I am sorry for the wait! Appreciate all of your patience. 🟠
Remember that we only send once a week. Curated and hand-made!
It’s been a while since Eshe was last featured here. In case you’re wondering, she’s my friend’s cat. She’s looking well, and I’m thrilled to share that she’s pregnant. 😺
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